This is my birthday week and as such, I think about it as my personal new year. This one comes complete with a new moon for setting intentions, and yes, I believe in moon cycles. A bit. I believe in everything a little, and some things more than others. What I know for sure is my own resilience, and looking back, it’s been a hellofayear x2.
I am a person transformed having lost many of the things and beings I thought I could not live without. Literally. Yet I’m still here and am heading down a path that is uniquely my own.
I’m leaning into my love of teaching and coaching with the launch of The Q Coach in February. I’m diving back into WoofTracks and allowing for the right partners and outcome for that (still brilliant) vision. I’m taking marketing work with great people only and leaving the non-committed behind. I’m designing my life my way and it’s more authentic than ever.
A while ago I wrote, “Sometimes everything shatters so that you are not tempted to pick up the pieces.” I knew then I was still in the throws of transformation and limbo, unsure of what was ahead but knowing it would be different. I wondered then when I would finally be grateful to not be able to reassemble my former life. It’s so tempting to reach for the glue when you cannot imagine the new form.
In an interview with Marie Forleo, author and blogger Glennon Doyle Melton was talking about rock bottoms and that she believes you can have many throughout your life. She describes rock bottom this way: “It’s like an eviction from your life. Whatever happens that there’s a before and after ... [It’s] an invitation to become something else.”
Yes, I’ve become something else. I can look back and see that now, though I know I’m not “done” by any means.
One of the things I believe in a little is the concept that every 7 years we are completely new, all of our cells having turned over at least once in that time. This birthday marks the 7th such cycle and I’m choosing to believe I am all new cells again, open to a new path.
“I’m not what just happened to me, but I might be what I do next.”
Glennon Doyle Melton
This year my “next” includes: upping my meditation game, more yoga, a revised workout habit, creating lots of content and working harder. If you know what I teach, you recognize these as process goals designed to get me to my desired outcomes. If you are a fan of my Desired Map coaching, then you might be interested to know my Core Designed Feelings (CDFs): Secure. Bountiful. Connected. Stretched. Foxy.
Just the other weekend I heard myself laugh and it was that deep, genuine laugh fully present. I was glad to be aware in that moment to acknowledge its return as I hadn’t consciously realized it had been absent for so long. It felt good and hopeful and honest. A perfect reflection of how I feel as I look ahead.